Jeff Sessions Recuses Himself from Russian Investigations: The Daily Show

Since Tuesday's speech to congress,
Donald Trump has been riding high on a wave of praise.
The media applauded him, people called him presidential,
Bannon... Bannon even let him sit at the desk.
And, uh, after a rough start to his presidency,
it felt like Trump had entered a long-awaited honeymoon.
But, just like most of Trump's honeymoons,
it got sour fast.
The Washington Post now reporting tonight
that Attorney General Jeff Sessions,
when he was still a senator
and an advisor to the Trump campaign,
had meetings with Russia's ambassador to the U.S.
Wow.
No matter how hard the Trump administration tries,
Russia just keeps coming back.
I'll say that Russia is Trump's herpes.
Not that I know anything about herpes.
I'm more of a gonorrhea guy.
From the middle of his campaign, Trump has been hounded
by accusations that he's in cahoots with Putin.
And there's no, like, real standing for this.
It's just because one time he said Putin is a great leader.
And he also said he supports Putin's policies,
and he also asked Putin to hack Hillary's e-mails
and he signs his executive orders "Donald J. Putin."
So... who knows. Who knows.
But what we do know
from a Washington Post report last night,
is that Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III
who is the first attorney general
to come from Middle Earth,
met with Russian officials during the campaign.
Which, people, is not a crime.
Everyone meets with Russians.
I don't know what the issue is.
The issue, at this point, really seems like one of transparency.
He didn't disclose the fact that he had those conversations
when he was directly asked about it
at his confirmation hearings
for attorney general earlier this year.
If there is any evidence
that anyone affiliated with the Trump campaign
communicated with the Russian government
in the course of this campaign, what will you do?
Senator Franken, I'm not aware of, um,
any of those activities.
I, uh, have been called a surrogate at a time or two
in that campaign, and I didn't have...
not have communications with the Russians.
(chuckling, murmuring)
I can't believe Jeff Sessions lied to America.
Especially after this country spent so many years
buying his cookies.
(laughter)
(cheering and applause)
What makes it worse, what makes it worse
is that he lied under oath
while interviewing to be the guy who prosecutes people
for lying under oath.
I mean, it sort of makes sense for Trump's cabinet
when you think about it, you know?
It makes sense for all of Trump's administration,
since Trump's EPA chief hates the environment,
his energy secretary wanted to abolish
the Department of Energy,
and the secretary of agriculture
is an actual swarm of locusts.
So, I mean, it all works out.
And before you judge Attorney General Jeff Sessions,
at least, at least let's hear his explanation.
No judging, people.
No judging.
REPORTER: A spokesperson at the Department of Justice noted
that, as a member of the Armed Services Committee last year,
the senator had over 25 conversations
with foreign ambassadors.
REPORTER 2: One department official said
there's just not strong recollection of what was said.
EVAN PEREZ:
Guilty! Guilty!
Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!
Guilty! Guilty!
Guil-ty! Guil-ty!
Guil-ty!
I'm sorry, that is not a decent excuse.
How do Trump's people keep forgetting
that they've met with Russians?
This is a thing. Let me tell you something,
if you meet a Russian, you'll remember that (bleep).
Those people make an impression.
The moment they say... (Russian accent): "Hello,"
it's an immediate fight-or-flight response.
You don't forget that.
Meeting a Russian is always the highlight of your day.
Like, you could meet an alien after you meet a Russian,
and still you'd be like, "You'll never guess what happened
"on the way to that alien. Oh, my God!
I met a Russian."
Every time we dig deeper into Trump's campaign,
it seems like there's a new person
who's connected to the Russians, you know?
First it was Manafort. Then it was Flynn.
The whole thing is like one of those Russian nesting dolls,
you know?
Yeah.
Every time one person goes away, someone else pops out.
You're like, "Oh, now it's Sessions."
But then if you open it up...
(grunting)
Oh!
What the (bleep), guys?!
(laughter)
(cheering and applause)
No. No.
No.
How many times do I have to tell you snakes are not funny?
Now, look, Trump just appointed, uh, Sessions,
and, uh, there's a Republican Congress,
so it's very unlikely that he's going to lose his job.
But today we saw that that doesn't mean
there were no consequences.
I've now decided to recuse myself
from any existing or future investigations
of any matter relating in any way
to the campaigns for president of the United States.
♪ Allow me to recuse myself ♪
♪ My name is Jeff. ♪
(laughter)
Ah, Jeff Sessions is out.
That's right.
He announced that any investigations
into Russian interference in the election
will not be handled by him
but by somebody totally independent.
And that person will be?
His friend Yuri. Yeah.
Everything's gonna be fine, people.

Jeff Sessions Recuses Himself from Russian Investigations: The Daily Show

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