Dumb Things In X-Men: Apocalypse Everyone Just Ignored

The X-Men film franchise has been going for nearly two decades now, thrilling and confusing
audiences with a convoluted narrative that incorporates time travel, alternate realities,
and iffy haircuts in equal measure.
Sometimes it's great.
And sometimes, well… let's just say the movies occasionally get a little too ambitious,
like with these dumb things in X-Men: Apocalypse that everyone just ignored.
Sunblock
While investigating the cult of En Sabah Nur, Moira MacTaggert discovers a staircase leading
to the top of Apocalypse's buried pyramid.
MacTaggart leaves the entrance uncovered, which allows sunlight to enter the ruins and
hit the top of the pyramid.
The light powers up the pyramid's underground machinery and results in Apocalypse's awakening,
kicking this whole thing off.
Close that door, lady!
"What's the matter, were you raised in a barn?
Shut the door!
Probably was raised in a barn, with all the other primitives."
Anyway, let's talk about that door — which is hidden under a single rug.
Surely, sunlight must have hit this thing before, right?
There's a whole bunch of dudes down there praying to the pyramid.
Each one had to climb up and down those same stairs, apparently during daylight hours.
And that's just in this one scene!
If a couple seconds of sunlight is all it takes to wake up Apocalypse, then the dude
must've been hitting his super-snooze button for years.
And seriously...one stupid rug was all that kept the literal, actual apocalypse at bay?
That must've been some rug.
"Yeah, man, it really tied the room together."
Apocalypse, how?
So many things don't make any sense about Apocalypse's origin that there's not enough
bandwidth on the internet to go into all of them — like, for instance, where he got
all the fancy futuristic technology from.
But let's look at the fact that Apocalypse can apparently do literally anything, at any
time, thanks to the seemingly billions of mutants he's drained powers from.
One question, though: what's his original power?
Is it transferring bodies?
Absorbing abilities?
Amplifying the powers of other mutants, which is the main thing he actually does in the
movie?
Would it be quicker to try and figure out what superpowers he doesn't have?
"Can you see through steel?"
"Ehh…"
"You know, with x-rays?
Can you bend iron bars with your mind?"
"Well, I uh… no."
Having a character who can do anything the story needs him to in order to fill any specific
plot requirement must have been handy for the screenwriters.
Too bad we never really find out what exactly the bad guy actually even does.
Phoenix farce
So what's even lazier than making a bad guy whose power is creating and filling plot holes
at superhuman speed?
Having him get defeated by a living deus ex machina.
Oh, sure, comics fans know that the Phoenix force Jean Grey unleashes at the end of the
movie is the most powerful weapon in the universe.
But throughout the entire movie, she's basically holding herself in check, in part at Professor
X's instruction, rather than actually using her powers.
And when the time comes — y'know, so the movie can end? — she just flips a switch
and instantly defeats Apocalypse.
So… why didn't she just do it at the start of the film instead?
It would have saved everyone a loud two hours of their lives that they'll never get back.
But this is Hollywood, so you have to put your ultimate weapon on the backburner in
order to beat the bad guy.
Ageless of Apocalypse
In this timeline, we first met Professor Charles Xavier in X-Men: First Class, set in 1962.
We also see the debuts of a number of his students, his dear friend and on-again, off-again
homicidal maniac Magneto, as well as his love interest, Moira MacTaggert.
X-Men: Apocalypse takes place in 1983, two decades after First Class — and no one has
aged at all.
The most egregious example of this is Alex "Havok" Summers.
He's in his teens in First Class when he's invited to become a child soldier in a paramilitary
organization for people with superpowers.
Twenty-one years later, he should be pushing forty — but looks like he's in his mid-twenties.
He also has a younger brother, Scott, who's still in high school in 1983, meaning Scott
wasn't even born until years after the events of First Class.
This franchise's timeline is already hard enough to follow as it is.
Seriously!
Not even the X-Men know who all the stupid X-Men are.
"All dead!
Countless others.
Can't remember their names for the life of me."
It never gets easier.
Thanks for watching!
Click the Looper icon to subscribe to our YouTube channel.
Plus check out all this cool stuff we know you'll love, too!

Dumb Things In X-Men: Apocalypse Everyone Just Ignored

Latest Posts