Tenement Museum

>> OKAY, SQUEEZE ON IN HERE GUYS.
OUR NEXT STOP ON THE MUSEUM TOUR IS THIS APARTMENT WHICH APPEARS
EXACTLY AS IT WOULD HAVE IN 1913.
>> OKAY, PAY ATTENTION, GUYS. SOME OF THIS IS GOING TO BE ON
THE QUIZ. >> NOW, THIS WAS THE HOME OF THE
LINZOWSKY'S, THE WORKING CLASS FAMILY FROM POLAND AND TO HELP
US UNDERSTAND WHAT IT WAS LIKE FOR THEM IN THE STRANGE NEW LAND
OF AMERICA, A GROUP OF HISTORICALLY TRAINED ACTORS WILL
BE JOINING US TO BRING THE LINZWSKY'S BACK TO LIFE.
IN FACT, I THINK I HEAR THEM NOW.
♪♪♪ >> MY DARLING AVA.
FOR 16 HOURS TODAY, I'LL BREAK MY HANDS IN FACTORY.
I CAN AFFORD TO BRING HOME CABBAGE FORKS, WE SHOULD HAVE
[INAUDIBLE]. WE SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN POLAND.
>> MICHAEL, OUR BODIES WILL HAVE TO BE FILLED WITH LOVE.
FOOD WILL BE A LUXURY FOR THE NEXT GENERATION.
>> AWE, THEY CAME HERE FOR THEIR CHILDREN.
>> >> I WISH I COULD BRING HOME
MORE MONEY --. THERE ARE NO GOOD JOBS.
THEY HAVE ALL BEEN TAKEN BY THE FILTHY GREASE BALL ITALIANS.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> WHAT DID HE SAY?
>> MITCHELL! SHAME ON YOU.
IT'S NOT THEIR FAULT THEY ARE GREASY.
THAT'S JUST HOW GOD MADE THEM. >> WELL, DID GOD ALSO MAKE THEM
ALL HORNY, KNUCKLE DRAGGING, MONKEY GRINDERS?
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> I'M NOT SURE THIS IS OKAY FOR
MY STUDENTS TO HEAR. >> OH, NO, NO.
I ASSURE YOU THIS CONVERSATION IS 100% HISTORICALLY ACCURATE.
>> MITCHELL, NO MORE TALK OF ITALIAN.
>> I DON'T LIKE TO SEE YOU UPSET OVER THIS CROTCH GRABBING LIAR
WHO ARE NOT EVEN REALLY WHITE PEOPLE.
>> OKAY, PLEASE. SIT AND RELAX AND EAT.
>> GOOD, NOW LOOK AT THE BULLS MRS. LINDOWSKY IS USING.
SOMETHING LIKE THAT WOULD BE A TREASURED FAMILY HEIRLOOM.
>> COOL. WHAT'S UP WITH THE ITALIAN
STUFF? >> HEY, LET'S JUST WAIT UNTIL
THE SCENE IS DONE FOR QUESTIONS. >> LET ME ASK YOU, HOW DO YOU
BRAIN WASH AN ITALIAN? >> HOW, MITCHELL?
>> YOU GIVE HIM AN ENEMA. >> THAT MAKES SENSE.
AND MITCHELL, DO YOU KNOW WHY ITALY IS SHAPED LIKE A BOOT?
>> WHY, MY LOVE? DO YOU THINK THEY CAN FIT THAT
MUCH CRAP INTO A TENNIS SHOE? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> THAT IS VERY TRUE, REALLY. >> SORRY.
ARE THEY JUST TELLING ITALIAN JOKES?
>> YES. >> I MUST GO OR I WILL BE LATE
FOR MY NIGHT SHIFT AT THE FACTORY.
>> YOU WORK SO HARD, MITCHELL. >> I WORK HARD IN FACTORY SO
THAT SOME DAY OUR CHILDREN WILL BE BOSS OF FACTORY AND THEN --
THEY WILL HIRE HALF WIT, RAT FACES AND WORK THEM TO DEATH AT
THE MACHINES. THIS IS MY DREAM.
>> AMAZING. LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE
LINDOWSKY'S. [ APPLAUSE ]
>> FEELS KIND OF WEIRD CLAPPING FOR THAT BUT ALL RIGHT.
>> NOW, MAGICALLY THE LINDOWSKY'S CAN HEAR YOU ALL THE
WAY BACK IN 1913. SO WOULD ANYONE LIKE TO ASK THEM
A QUESTION? >> HI.
UM, YOU SAY GREASE BALL IS IT BECAUSE THE FOOD IS GREASY OR
THEY ARE? >> PLEASE DON'T ANSWER THAT.
ANYONE ELSE? >> I HAVE A QUESTION.
>> HE HAS CHOCOLATE FACE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> AND YOU JUST ANSWERED IT. >> ACTUALLY, I HAVE A QUESTION
FOR MRS. LINDOWSKY. THAT CONTRAPTION THERE, I DON'T
KNOW WHAT IT IS. CAN YOU TELL ME ABOUT IT?
>> YES, THIS IS FOR TO DRY CLOTHES.
YOU PUT THE WET FABRIC HERE AND YOU TURN AND LEAVE IT LIKE THIS.
ONE BED SHEET, THREE HOURS. WOW.
A LOT HARDER THAN JUST TOSSING YOUR CLOTHES IN THE DRIER, HUH?
>> BUT IT WILL NOT ALWAYS BE THIS WAY FOR MY WIFE.
I WORK HARD AND I SAVE MONEY. AND ONE DAY, GOD WILLING, I
HIRED CHOCOLATE LADY TO DO THIS FOR ME.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> NOPE.
>> YEAH, WE'RE LEAVING.

Tenement Museum - SNL

Latest Posts