I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU SINCE THE
OSCARS.
AND YOU LOOK -- YOU LOOK BETTER
WITHOUT ALL THAT HORRIBLE HAIR.
>> YOU THINK SO?
YOU MENTIONED IT EARLIER.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> IT TAKES ME A YEAR TO GROW A
SINGLE WHISKER.
SO ONCE I HAD IT I WAS HOLDING
ON TO IT.
I KEPT IT BECAUSE I WAS SHOOTING
SOMETHING.
YOU KEPT YOURS.
>> Jimmy: I CAN GROW MINE
OVERNIGHT.
I ACTUALLY SHAVED THIS MORNING
AND IT'S BACK.
HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> EVERYTHING'S GREAT.
>> Jimmy: HAS IT CHANGED YOUR
LIFE BEING THE OSCAR WINNER FOR
BEST ACTOR?
>> Re
>> NO, NOT REALLY.
NOTHING CHANGES.
IT WAS A TERRIFYING EXPERIENCE.
>> Jimmy: IT SEEMED LIKE YOU HAD
NOTHING PLANNED WHEN YOU GOT UP
THERE.
>> YEAH.
NO.
>> Jimmy: IS IT TRUE?
>> THAT'S TRUE.
I MEAN, YOU KNOW, TO BE HONEST,
I CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT I SAID.
I CAN'T -- AND I'M GLAD BECAUSE
I HAVE A FEELING THAT IF I DID
REMEMBER OR I WATCHED IT AGAIN
I'D BE VERY EMBARRASSED.
>> Jimmy: OH, YOU'VE NOT WATCHED
IT.
>> I HAVEN'T WATCHED IT.
>> Jimmy: I CAN UNDERSTAND THAT.
I DO REMEMBER BASICALLY WHAT
HAPPENED.
SO I'LL FILL YOU IN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
YOU DID THANK YOUR BROTHER BEN,
WHICH WAS GOOD BECAUSE YOU
TOTALLY FORGOT HIM AT THE GOLDEN
GLOBES.
>> HE COMPLAINED THE MOST.
SEW GOT THANKED.
>> Jimmy: YOU GAVE HIM A VERY --
YOU WERE VERY NICE TO HIM.
YOU DID NEGLECT TO THANK YOUR
KIDS YOUR SONS.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Jimmy: SO THAT WAS BAD.
[ LAUGHTER ]
OR WAS THAT BAD?
>> THAT WAS TERRIBLE.
I IMMEDIATELY REALIZED I HADN'T
DONE THAT.
THAT WAS A SHAME.
I FEEL A LITTLE LIKE PETER.
I WANTED TO MAKE MY SPEECH
AGAIN.
>> Jimmy: THE KID --
>> YEAH, THE HIGH SCHOOL KID.
THAT WAS A BRILLIANT SPEECH, BY
THE WAY.
>> Jimmy: GO AHEAD, MAKE YOUR
SPEECH IF YOU WANT TO.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
COME ON, PETER.
>> THE THING IS -- I'M GOING TO
KILL YOU.
[ LAUGHTER ]
THE THING I WANTED TO SAY REALLY
WAS THAT I'M NOT GOING TO MAKE
THE SPEECH BUT WHAT I WISH I HAD
SAID WAS TO MY KIDS BECAUSE THEY
ARE KIND OF -- YOU KNOW, IT'S
THE REASON YOU DO ANYTHING.
AND THEY'RE THE MOST IMPORTANT
THING IN YOUR LIFE.
I ALSO -- AFTERWARD I THOUGHT
ABOUT HOW IT WAS -- HOW THEY
PERCEIVED, IT DAD UP THERE ON TV
AT THIS FANCY SHOW AND WHAT IS
HE DOING THERE.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> WHICH IS A GOOD QUESTION KIND
OF.
I JUST WANT -- I PROBABLY DID
WANT TO TELL THEM THAT LIKE
THERE WERE MANY YEARS IN THERE,
THOUSANDS OF AUDITIONS I DIDN'T
GET, MANY PARTS I DID GET AND
THEY SUCKED.
SO IT HASN'T ALWAYS BEEN
TROPHIES, YOU KNOW.
AND THERE WILL BE MANY MORE
DECADES OF STRUGGLING AND DOING
BAD MOVIES AND NOT GETTING PARTS
AGAIN.
>> Jimmy: IS THAT THE PLAN?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YES.
THAT'S THE PLAN.
>> Jimmy: AND THE KIDS --
>> I WANTED TO LECTURE MY KIDS.
THAT'S WHAT I REALLY WISH I HAD
DONE WITH MY TIME-S GET UP AND
LECTURE MY KIDS.
>> Jimmy: IT'S PROBABLY BETTER.
THEY PROBABLY GOT OFF EASY.
DID YOU CALL THEM AFTERWARDS?
>> I CALLED THEM IMMEDIATELY.
I WENT INTO THE WINGS I CALLED
THEM UP AND I SAID I WON THIS
THING, THE OSCARS, BUT I DIDN'T
MENTION YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MY
LIFE AND I LOVE YOU MORE THAN
ANYTHING AND I WOULD TRADE A
THOUSAND OSCARS FOR YOU GUYS.
AND I STILL FELT BAD.
SO I WENT HOME RIGHT AFTER AND I
GAVE THEM THE OSCAR.
WHICH I THOUGHT WAS LIKE -- THEY
WOULD LIKE.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> AND A FEW WEEKS LATER, THIS
IS TRUE.
I WENT INTO ONE OF THEIR ROOMS
AND I SAW IT ACTUALLY IN THE
CORNER WITH LIKE A WET TOWEL
OVER IT AND LIKE CLOTHES AND
STUFF.
AND I WAS LIKE, YOU KNOW WHAT,
I'M GOING TO HANG ON TO IT,
GUYS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
STILL YOURS.
I'M GOING TO HANG ON TO IT.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: WERE THE BOYS WATCHING
AT THE TIME?
>> THEY WERE WATCHING I'M SURE.
>> Jimmy: YES.
>> WAITING FOR THEIR --
>> Jimmy: WAITING FOR DAD TO
THANK THEM.
>> LIKE THANKS, BOYS.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S GOOD INCENTIVE
FOR YOUR NEXT OSCAR CAMPAIGN.
YOU'VE GOT TO THANK THE KIDS
THIS TIME.
>> YOU KNOW, YOU DID A GREAT
JOB.
I'M SURE YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE.
NOT JUST HOSTING IT BUT I
MEAN --
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: THANKS, GUYS.
>> NOT THAT GREAT.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT YOUR KIDS
TOLD ME.
THEY CALLED ME AND SAID YOU WERE
THE BEST ONE ON THE SHOW.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> THAT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY
DON'T WATCH THE PROGRAM.
[ LAUGHTER ]
THEY SAID --
>> Jimmy: AND YET THEY STILL
CALLED.
>> I'D LIKE TO FINISH MY STORY.
THEY TOLD ME THAT -- NO, THEY
DIDN'T TELL ME.
YOU WERE SITTING RIGHT BEHIND ME
AT THE END OF THE SHOW WHEN IT
KIND OF WENT SIDEWAYS A LITTLE
BIT.
YOU WERE THE VERY FIRST
PERSON -- BECAUSE YOU WERE
SITTING BEHIND ME.
I HEARD YOU SAY THIS ISN'T GOOD.
AND I THOUGHT WHY IS JIMMY --
WHAT'S HE TALKING ABOUT?
BEFORE I REALIZED, BEFORE ANYONE
REALIZED THAT SOMETHING WEIRD IT
HAPPENED.
AND YOU JUMPED RIGHT UP.
MOST PEOPLE I THINK WOULD
PROBABLY TRY TO STAY AWAY FROM A
SITUATION LIKE THAT.
YOU LEAPT RIGHT INTO THE
SPOTLIGHT TO TRY TO HELP FIGURE
THINGS OUT.
>> Jimmy: I'M LIKE A FIRST
RESPONDER.
YOU'RE SAYING I'M A HERO.
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING?
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
WOW, THANK YOU.
I DIDN'T REALIZE WHAT