DUMBEST CUSTOMERS EVER #3 | Dolan True Stories

• From customers screaming fuck at employees for no reason, to a dad accidentally poisoning
a bunch of kids, the Planet Dolan crew re-eneacts some of the best true stories from our subreddit
about the worst customers they’ve ever interacted with.
I’m Nixxiom and today I’ll be your narrator 10 – Simtimzero Andie
Several years back Andie was working returns at a computer store.
It was a slow day before a customer burst through the front door holding a dented iMac.
When he put it on the counter it became pretty clear that the dent was a bullet hole.
After setting the computer down he just wandered off towards the apple section.
20 minutes later, the guy comes back with one of the sales people and a new iMac.
She began to try and tell him that she couldn’t exchange a computer that had been shot, but
it turns out he was just going to buy a new one and wanted the store to dispose it for
some reason.
Andie couldn’t help but ask how it happened.
He told her that he just so happened to be cleaning his gun while checking his email
when he noticed a message from his daughter.
She confessed that she was working as a stripper now.
Apparently, at this point the gun “accidentally” went off at his $2,000 computer.
9 - RowCro Pringle When Pringle was working self-check out at
a grocery store, a woman asked for some help with a sale that wasn't working.
It was a “buy one, get one free” box of some generic cereal.
After looking through her purchases, he pointed out that she only had one box.
She earnestly replied that she had bought the other box on a previous trip.
8 – BottledPride Melissa One time Melissa was working the register
window at a McDonald's when she had an older couple use the drive thru; they ordered a
McMuffin and a coffee.
The couple pulled up to her window.
They had a coupon to make the McMuffin only cost a dollar, the same price as the coffee.
"But I thought it was only one dollar."
the lady complained after Melissa told her the price.
Melissa died a little inside and explained to her: “yes, the sandwich is only a dollar,
but so is the coffee, so it's two dollars together.”
The lady continued on complaining that she didn't get it.
Melissa mimed a coffee in one hand and a McMuffin in the other.
"This one costs a dollar and this one costs a dollar, if you put them together you’ve
got something that costs two dollars!" explained Melissa.
The lady still didn’t get it, so the two argued fruitlessly while the lady’s husband
was laughing his ass off in the passenger's seat.
He eventually reached over her and gave over another dollar, all the while she complained
that he shouldn't do it and that he's wasting her money.
7 –Lycan_Jedi Gooby Gooby had a customer call her store saying
the fruit juice they sold was bad.
Her friend took the call and asked for more details.
He said he bought some juice for his Daughter’s birthday party, that it tasted bitter and
that one kid had a sick stomach.
Turns out it wasn’t expired, or a faulty product, or anything like that at all.
The guy had bought something called Fabuloso, a type of floor cleaner.
Gooby’s friend told him to call poison control right away.
The next thing Gooby’s friend heard was the phone being put down and:
‘FUCK!
BABE!
GET THE JUICE AWAY FROM THE KIDS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW!’
Then, the man picked up the phone and simply said ‘I gotta go, bye.’
6 - xenolith84 Mimi Mimi worked at a WalMart during the store’s
grand opening when a customer asked her to help him find something he said he bought
there last week.
She told the customer that today was the store’s first day of being open.
She thought he might have been confused as there’s another WalMart in town.
She looked everywhere for the headphone adapter he was looking for.
After about 10 minutes of looking for the item, she told him that they didn’t carry
it.
Upon hearing this news he yelled and cussed her out.
She asked to see the packaging of the item.
Mimi turned it over upon receiving it.
It said RadioShack on the bottom.
After hearing the embarrassing news, he took the package, said sorry and left with his
tail between his legs.
5 - checkers04 Doopie Doopie was at a store waiting to check out
some items when the lady in front of her started screaming at the cashier to wash the conveyor
belt that you put the groceries on.
The lady proceeded to scream “I'll get sick and literally die if I put my groceries on
that!”
“I mean, it’ll probably be fine,” replied the cashier.
To this reply, the lady screamed and tried to rip up the belt while kicking everything
in sight.
Not sure exactly what happened after the security guards dragged her off.
4 - Toby1knobi04 Squid Salty Squid was grocery shopping and when
he saw a customer shoving crisps, sweets and chocolates into a bag.
He went to the cashier and told him that a morbidly obese man was stealing all of the
sweets.
Squid must have been blunt or something because the cashier couldn’t stop laughing at this
news for like 5 minutes.
By the time the cashier stopped laughing, the thief was walking out the front door.
The cashier confronted the robber, but he kept on denying the deed.
Eventually, Mr. Fat man admitted that he’d stolen it all, but he was willing to share
the sweets with the two of them.
The cashier said "Fuck off" and Squid said "naaaahhhhhhh”.
3 - tsundereequeen Dolan Dolan had a girl come in to the EB Games he
worked at with a pre-order card.
She asked him to get a game from the back.
After looking through all of the games he realised the game wasn’t even close to being
out.
Dolan went back and asked her if she was aware of this fact and just stood there like he
was going to pull the game out of nowhere.
2 - EonGen Spincess Spincess was at a dollar store when she saw
someone try to get money back for a bag of Cheetos.
His reasoning was that the bag contained one teensy burnt Cheeto that he had with with
him, the rest of them had been eaten.
The store clerk tried to explain to the man that if he had any problems, he should call
the number on the back of the bag.
The man responded completely rationally and yelled profanities at the store clerk.
It didn’t take long for the irate customer to get so mad that he started calling the
clerk racial slurs.
At that point Spincess and her buddies, who ironically were buying Cheetos themselves,
got angry and tried to fight for the store clerk.
The man saw he was out numbered and stamped out of the store, cussing at everyone he passed.
1 – Was submitted by Me.
One day while working at my job at a clothing store a woman walked up to me and asked for
my help.
I asked her what was wrong and she presented to me a green rag that was sealed in a plastic
wrapper.
She asked me: “How am I supposed to know what color this is before I buy it?”
I didn’t know what she meant.
I looked at the green rag, looked back at her, she gave it to me, I looked it over,
and then I said: “Uhh…
What do you mean?”
She then go very angry and repeated: “How am I supposed to know what color this is!?”
I just looked down at the rag a final time and said: “It’s green, ma’am?”
She then snatched the package out of my hand, glared at me, said “thank you for your help”
in a snobby way, and stormed off.
I dunno – maybe she was totally color blind or something, or maybe she was having a bad
day, but she told my manager that I was mean to her, but I didn’t get in trouble, so
who cares.
A huge thanks to everybody who submitted their stories, and just like before we have another
question for you all.
“What is the biggest risk you took that ended badly?”
Let us know in the reddit page linked below and you might be featured in a future countdown!

DUMBEST CUSTOMERS EVER #3 | Dolan True Stories

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