Paige Sex Tape Joke! John Cena RETURNS! | WWE Smackdown Live, July 4, 2017 Review

Rusev debuts on Smackdown Live!
John Cena returns!
And The Usos completely failing to keep things PG.
I’m Oli Davis, and this is the 4th July 2017 edition of Smackdown Live...in about
4 minutes.
John Cena Returns John Cena’s long-hyped, big WWE return segment
was...a promo like most other John Cena promos.
John Cena loves two things: America and WWE.
So coming back to Smackdown on Independence Day was effectively his birthday.
But his homecoming speech was ruined by Rusev’s Smackdown Live debut, who proceeded to cut
an anti-USA promo.
Making Smackdown not just the land of opportunity, but also the land of outdated foreign heel
gimmicks.
John suggested they have a Flag match right there, but the fight was made for Battleground
instead.
Just a month ago, Rusev was reportedly planned to fight Randy Orton for the WWE Championship
at Money in the Bank.
Now he’s losing to Cena in a three weeks’ time in a gimmick match.
AJ Styles beat Chad Gable As United States champion Kevin Owens had
beaten both AJ Styles and Chad Gable in recent weeks, Daniel Bryan put them in a match with
an Independence Day Battle Royal spot at stake.
The two worked a really smooth 7 minute match, with AJ helping Gable up afterwards in a show
of respect.
Smackdown might have completely dropped the ball on American Alpha, but they’re booking
Gable’s steady progression very well.
The Carmellabration Carmella’s Money in the Bank briefcase ‘Carmellabration’
was ruined by Daniel Bryan announcing James Ellsworth isn’t just banned from the arena
tonight, not just fined $10,000, but he’s also suspended for 30 days for interfering
in last week’s Money in the Bank match.
And if he somehow breaks back in, Carmella loses the briefcase.
Ellsworth did need some comeuppance, but it’s a shame Smackdown is losing his act with Carmella
for a month.
Hopefully we’ll get some Carmellsworth skits to fill the interim.
Naomi beat Lana This transitioned into Lana’s third shot
at Naomi’s GLOW title - which is an actual description of the belts new fancy lights,
nothing to do with the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling Netflix series.
Just like the Alicia Fox vs Sasha Banks feud from several months ago, Lana got a rematch
because her shoulder was mistakenly up during last week’s pin.
Not like it mattered.
Naomi made Lana tap almost immediately.
To everyone’s confusion, Tamina came down afterwards and escorted Lana from the ring.
The Usos vs New Day: Rap Battle Then came one of the best WWE segments in
months, perfectly capturing the seemingly improvisational, reality-based lines that
are so lacking in today’s product: The Usos vs The New Day in a rap battle.
The New Day had plenty of zingers, with Xavier Woods claiming The Usos were nothing until
Jimmy’s wife got them on Total Divas, and calling them Roman Reigns’ bag carriers.
But The Usos won it in the first round, when they referenced Xavier’s starring role in
the Paige sex tape leak: “Let’s just keep it PG, you know what’s
good… don’t get all Rated R like ya boy Xavier Woods.”
Somebody stop the damn match!
The crowd erupted, and Kofi’s follow-up ‘The Usos look a bit flabby’ line was
awkwardly tame.
The level of Savage had been irreparably raised.
Rap artist judge Wale - who was sporting an excellent retro WCW top - declared New Day
as the winners via DQ when The Usos got physical.
It was an unfortunately limp ending to a surprisingly heated moment.
They should’ve had a big pull apart brawl heading into the commercial break, transitioning
the storyline from usual New Day comedy schtick to heated blood feud.
Aiden English beat Randy Orton Aiden English beat Randy Orton!
Sure, it was because Randy got himself disqualified, but hey, Aiden’s gotta take them where he
can get them.
Jinder Mahal and Randy went back and forth on promos afterwards, still failing to get
me even slightly interested in their feud.
Independence Day Battle Royal The night’s main event was the ‘Here’s
A Bunch Of Your Favourite Wrestlers Missing From Smackdown’ Battle Royal.
We got to see Tye Dillinger go to the final three.
See that Luke Harper is still with the company.
After a bunch of quick eliminations - including Mojo Rawley throwing his Hype Bro Zack Ryder
over the top rope, yet another example of a tag team breaking up - it came down to Sami
Zayn vs a man who’d already wrestled that night, AJ Styles.
Just like PWInsider broke last week, AJ won, and he scuffled with Kevin Owens to close
the show.
So that was this week’s Smackdown Live in about 4 minutes, here’s the usual ratings
recap from top to bottom: SmackDamn, Smacktastic, Smack Bang In The Middle, Ellsworthy and Raw.
I’ll reveal my score very shortly, but first, vote in the poll above my head to give it
your own rating.
I’ll announce the results in tomorrow’s WrestleTalk News.
This was a very enjoyable episode of Smackdown, with a fun main event, a great Rap Battle
segment, and the steady build of Chad Gable.
The John Cena and Rusev returns, however, were very weak, the WWE Championship feud
remains a chore, and Smackdown’s disposition for anti-American heels is becoming increasingly
trite.
This week’s Smackdown is Smack Bang in the Middle.
Find out all the details of The Colons requesting their WWE release.
And did Paige just show up at TNA?
Click the videos to the left to learn more, press subscribe and support WrestleTalk on
Patreon.
I’ve been Oli Davis and that was wrestling.

Paige Sex Tape Joke! John Cena RETURNS! | WWE Smackdown Live, July 4, 2017 Review

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