Stephen Warns Trump About The Dangers Of Self-Pardoning

>> Stephen: PLEASE HAVE A SEAT, EVERYBODY!
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
WELCOME BACK, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
RUSSIA CONTINUES TO BE A HOT TOPIC AROUND THE WHITE HOUSE,
AND TRUMP SON-IN-LAW AND GUY GETTING
A KICK OUT OF WATCHING HIS NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE BURN DOWN,
JARED KUSHNER OR THE KUTCH --
>> Jon: HEY, HEY.
>> Stephen: THAT'S WHAT THEY CALL HIM.
FROM NOW ON, THE MOOCH AND THE KUTCH!
HE SPOKE TO THE SENATE INTELLIGENCE COMMITTEE IN A
CLOSED-DOOR LIGHTS-ON SESSION.
THEY WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT THAT MEETING WITH RUSSIANS LAST YEAR.
AND I REALIZE THAT DOESN'T NARROW THINGS DOWN, SPECIFICALLY
THE JUNE 9 MEETING WITH DONALD TRUMP, JR., PAUL MANAFORT, AND
WHAT TURNED OUT TO BE ALL OF THE BROTHERS KARAMOZOV.
WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WAS SAID, 'CAUSE IT'S NONE OF OUR
BUSINESS.
BUT KUSHNER PRE-RELEASED AN 11-PAGE PRE-BUTTAL.
IN IT, HE LISTED ALL OF HIS RESPONSIBILITIES DURING THE
CAMPAIGN, INCLUDING SCHEDULING, COMMUNICATIONS, SPEECHWRITING,
POLLING, DATA AND DIGITAL TEAMS, AS WELL AS BECOMING A POINT OF
CONTACT FOR FOREIGN GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS.
HE WAS ALSO IN CHARGE OF BUYING COPY PAPER, REFILLING THE SNACK
DRAWER, REMINDING DONALD TRUMP WHAT HIS WIFE'S NAME IS, AND
TAKING ERIC TO THE VET WHEN HE STARTED TO MOLT.
( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND KUSHNER WAS SO BUSY, HE DIDN'T KNOW THE MEETING WAS
ABOUT RUSSIANS HAVING DIRT ON HILLARY BECAUSE, WHEN DON, JR.
INVITED HIM, "THAT EMAIL WAS ON TOP OF A LONG BACK AND FORTH
THAT I DID NOT READ AT THE TIME."
SO HE DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS A CONFIDENTIAL MEETING ABOUT
RUSSIA HELPING AGAINST CLINTON.
WHAT WAS THE SUBJECT LINE AGAIN?
"RUSSIA-- CLINTON, PRIVATE CONFIDENTIAL."
"OOH, AN EMAIL.
SKIP THE SUBJECT LINE, SKIP THE CONTENTS... AND... I'M IN."
SO, IS THERE A REASON FOR THEM TO BE WORRIED?
WHO KNOWS?
WHO KNOWS IF THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION SHOULD BE
WORRIED.
DONALD TRUMP DOES BECAUSE, ON THURSDAY,
"TRUMP AND HIS LEGAL TEAM HAVE DISCUSSED HIS POWER TO PARDON
THOSE CLOSE TO HIM INCLUDING HIMSELF."
( AUDIENCE REACTS ) OH, YES, YES.
MR. PRESIDENT, YOU SHOULD KNOW, SELF-PARDONING IS A SIN.
OKAY?
HOW DO YOU THINK JUSTICE WENT BLIND?
>> Jon: OH, YEAH!
>> Stephen: THEN, ON SATURDAY, TRUMP TWEETED,
"WHILE ALL AGREE THE U.S.
PRESIDENT HAS THE COMPLETE POWER TO PARDON, WHY THINK OF THAT
WHEN THE ONLY CRIME SO FAR IS 'LEAKS' AGAINST US.
FAKE NEWS."
( LAUGHTER ) >> Jon: OH!
>> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "WHY THINK OF THAT?!"
YOU'RE THE ONE TWEETING ABOUT IT!
IT'S LIKE SOMEONE GOING, "WE ALL AGREE I HAVE THE POWER TO TAKE
HERPES MEDICATION.
BUT WHY THINK OF THAT?" ( LAUGHTER )
WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME UPSTAIRS?
( LAUGHTER ) ALSO, JIMMY, COULD YOU GO BACK?
THE ONLY CRIME SO FAR?
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
HE'S HEDGING A LITTLE BIT.
"YOU'RE HONOR, I PLEAD NOT GUILTY.
SO FAR."
( LAUGHTER ) ALSO IN THAT TWEET, TRUMP CALLED
THE RUSSIA STORY FAKE NEWS AND FLOATED PARDONING HIMSELF FOR
IT!
REMINDS ME OF THE NEW TESTAMENT WHEN THE APOSTLE JUDAS SAID,
"SURELY, 'I' WILL NOT BETRAY YOU, MY LORD, BUT, IF I DID,
YOU'D HAVE TO FORGIVE ME, RIGHT?
THAT'S LIKE YOUR WHOLE DEAL.
ALSO, ARE YOU A COP?
YOU HAVE TO TELL ME IF YOU'RE A COP."
( LAUGHTER ) WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
WITH PAUL BETTANY!
STICK AROUND!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )

Stephen Warns Trump About The Dangers Of Self-Pardoning

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