How America Accidentally Invented The Nazis

- America!
The land of the free, the home of the Brave!
Give me your tired and your poor!
We were the first to the moon, we invented Rock 'n Roll!
We have a Beyonce!
We made Nazis!
I'm sorry, what did I just read?
These were non-refundable.
Yes, Captain America punched Nazis in his day,
but a lesser known part of history?
Hitler's Nazi Party wrote almost all of their
anti-Jewish laws based off of our own Jim Crow Laws.
And if you're like me and heard that fact
and tore through your old High School history book
to find that chapter you probably faked sick during
but came up with nothing, don't worry, you're not alone.
Liars, all of you!
Liars!
Why are you lying to me?!
Oh, no, I like that chapter.
That's women's rights.
Agh!
But for real, there's a lot of talk right now
about remembering our American history
and not erasing it, well,
here's the real history lesson our books have been erasing.
First, let's start with Hitler
and the Nazi Party's attitude towards America.
There were many things about America that they hated,
including our innovation, go-get 'em attitude,
and the, hey immigrants, come on over!
He hated all of that.
But he did not hate our racism.
Oh, and our Walt Disney.
Although he may have just been reading
into Snow White's name just a little too much.
Hitler saw the United States as a potential future ally.
America was a master at creating second class citizens
despite our freedom for all attitude.
In Hitler's eyes, we were the most advanced country
when it came to legal discrimination,
and he admired our endeavor to keep
the Nordic race on top.
On September 15th, 1935, Hitler met with his top advisers
to draft what would become the Nuremberg Laws,
which would strip millions of Jewish people
of their civil rights.
During the meeting, Hitler and his top advisers
looked at the United State's Jim Crow laws
as guidance to draft legislation.
Hitler was super interested in how we successfully
implemented laws that prevented interracial marriages.
He also thought we did a super good job telling people apart
so we could be more easily racist towards on another.
Specifically, they copied two of America's Jim Crow Laws,
the Miscegenation laws, which prohibited members
of different races from marrying,
and the one drop rule, which stated that anyone
with one drop of black ancestry was considered black.
Hitler saw that and was like hell yeah,
can I have some of that please?
As long as there isn't a drop of non white blood in it,
thank you so much, thank you.
So yeah, we made Nazis.
Also the guy who made sea monkeys, Harold Nathan Braunhut,
was a white supremacist.
So, yeah, if that doesn't just ruin your day.
Sea monkeys, man, sucks.
So yes, Hitler may have loved us for perfecting
the marginalization of large groups within the confines
of the law, but, as I said earlier,
Hitler also hated us.
He hated our innovation, our American Spirit,
he hated our land of immigrants.
And, believe it or not, those are exactly the things
that United us to not only beat Hitler,
but also sow the seeds of the Civil Rights Movement.
America entered the war, which sparked
the Double V Campaign.
It's aim was to gain victory abroad against the Nazis,
and victory here at home against Jim Crow laws.
This was a huge step towards the Civil Rights Movement.
America also accepted Jewish immigrants into the country.
Many of them still faced anti-Semitism here in the states
and went to teach in the South
in predominately black schools.
So German racism and terrible American racism
brought these groups together, and those professors
taught ideas that would be integral
to the social movement of the 60s.
It's a lot easier to write jokes for things
that aren't sad, like Gremlins, thanks Dan.
So yeah, we kinda made Nazis.
But then also we Captain America punched them into oblivion
and those who were oppressed came to America
to nudge us towards the Civil Rights Movement,
one of the most American things to ever happen in America,
and championed rights for those affected by Jim Crow
and women and immigrants and Native Americans
and pretty much every person here in the United States.
Not only that, but looking at the
White Nationalist movement today?
Nothing they have to say is new.
It's just a reiteration of ideas that regurgitate themselves
every few years to give power to the few at the top
who would rather see us angry at each other
and blame each other for our misfortune than being
angry at the people who own 1% of all the economy's wealth.
And if you're a white Nationalist watching this,
and you think hey, Hitler wasn't wrong,
he had the right idea.
You know that Hitler also thought that you guys came
from the underwater city of Atlantis, right?
Like, that's the best he could come up with
as to why you were better than everyone else.
Because you come from a mystical land of glittery mermaids.
But hey if you think he was right,
go ahead and go look for Atlantis.
Just walk right into that ocean.
Without any life preservers.
Just keep going, don't turn around.
Call me when you find it, thank you so much.
So there you go!
Knowing our real history is important.
Otherwise we don't see how oppressive systems are connected
or how America can rise to the occasion,
toppling these oppressive systems and creating a newer,
better society afterwards
even if it's only one step at a time.
America!
The Civil Rights Movement, the Stonewall Riots!
Beyonce, we get to have a Beyonce!
Not sure how I feel about Walt Disney anymore.
The women's suffrage movement!
Beyonce, guys!
Oh, sea monkeys though, yeah.
Sea monkeys is the bummer.
That still hurts, but America.
Yay.
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How America Accidentally Invented The Nazis

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