Weekend Update: Theresa May

>> THE BRITISH PARLIAMENT ERUPTED IN ANGER AFTER PRESIDENT
TRUMP RETWEETED ANTI-MUSLIM VIDEOS FROM A BRITISH HATE
GROUP. HERE TO RESPOND IS BRITISH PRIME
MINISTER, THERESA MAY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> HELLO, COLIN. IT'S LOVELY TO BE HERE.
THE UNITED KINGDOM SENDS ITS APPRECIATION FOR THE SPECIAL
FRIENDSHIP THAT WE SHARE. >> REALLY?
BECAUSE THINGS SEEM TO BE A LITTLE TENSE RIGHT NOW BETWEEN
YOU AND PRESIDENT TRUMP. >> UH-HUH, BUT YOU KNOW THE
BRITS, STIFF UPPER LIP. WHEN WE ARE DEALING WITH TRUMP,
IT'S MORE AKIN TO STIFF UPPER LIP, LOWER LIP, STIFF ARMS,
LEGS, AND YOU ARE PRETTY MUCH PLAYING DEAD.
BUT THE BRITISH PEOPLE KNOW I CAN GIVE IT AS GOOD AS I GET IT.
I'M NOT AFRAID OF A LITTLE SOCIAL MEDIA FIST TO CUFFS.
>> YEAH, YOU AND PRESIDENT TRUMP, I SAW, REALLY GOT INTO IT
ON TWITTER. >> YES, AND I'VE NEVER FELT MORE
ALIVE. I SAW THOSE DREADFUL MUSLIM
RETWEETS AND I PUT THAT MAN ON BLAST.
LISTEN TO THIS EPIC TAKEDOWN. [ CLEARS THROAT ]
"IT IS WRONG FOR THE PRESIDENT TO HAVE DONE THIS."
[ LAUGHTER ] SAVAGE.
FLAME EMOJI. I'M PRACTICALLY A TROLL NOW.
>> RIGHT. YEAH, AND THEN TRUMP RESPONDED
TO YOUR STATEMENT WITH A TWEET TELLING YOU TO BACK OFF.
>> YES, BUT THE BITCH TAGGED THE WRONG THERESA MAY.
THAT'S INTERNET 101, BABY. IT'S THRILLING TO ENGAGE IN A
FLAME WAR, TO DUNK ON THE THIRSTY BITCH.
OH, IT'S ELECTRIC. I'M HARD.
I'M ACTUALLY HARD. >> WOW, I GOTTA SAY, YOU SOUND
LIKE A WHOLE NEW THERESA MAY. >> MM-HMM, YES, I'M ON A ROLL
NOW. WHO ELSE WANTS TO GO A FEW
ROUNDS WITH THERESA MAYWEATHER? KIM JONG-UN?
TAKE THIS TWEET. MR. KIM JONG-UN, GOOD SIR, DO
GROW UP. #PLEASE."
>> PRETTY GOOD. >> TALK ABOUT GETTING OWNED.
AND VLADIMIR PUTIN. JUST THIS.
THE SIDE EYE EMOJI. HE KNOWS WHAT IT MEANS.
IT'S CALLED SHADE, COLIN. HE WILL BE FREAKING, I ASSURE
YOU. AND THEN I'LL FOLLOW IT UP WITH
A VERY THREATENING EGG PLANT. >> PRIME MINISTER, DO YOU KNOW
WHAT THAT MEANS? >> YES.
EAT YOUR VEGETABLES. YOU HEAR THAT?
HOW YOU LIKE US NOW? BRITAIN IS BACK, BABY.
THERESA MAY BE STRONG, AND BELOVED BY ALL.
I'M GOING FULL TRUMP. AND EVEN MY OWN PEOPLE AREN'T
SAFE. LOOK AT THIS THREAD I WROTE ON
PRINCE HARRY. "CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR
UPCOMING NUPTIALS. BUT CHECK IT -- SHE OUT YOUR
LEAGUE. YOU LOOK LIKE ED SHEERAN, MINUS
THE ABILITIES. NEVERTHELESS, WOULD BANG."
>> THERESA MAY, EVERYONE.
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Weekend Update: Theresa May - SNL

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