Morning Joe Michael Wolff Cold Open

>>> WELCOME TO THE NUT HOUSE ♪♪♪ >> GOOD MORNING.
>> GOOD MORNING. >> THAT'S A GREAT SONG.
WHO IS THAT. ?
>> JOE, YOU KNOW WHO IT IS. >> OH, YEAH, THAT'S ME.
THAT'S MY ORIGINAL JAM. I'M JOE, THAT'S MIKA.
THIS GUY IS SMELLING ALONG. WE PLAYED THAT SONG LIVE AT
PROHIBITION. MIKA WAS THERE.
>> I COME BECAUSE I HAVE TO. >> YOU COME BECAUSE I TELL YOU
TO. >> OH, MY GOD.
CAN WE NOT BE THIS SELF-AGGRANDIZING THIS EARLY IN
THE MORNING? YOU ARE DISGUSTING.
>> YOU ARE FOUL. >> I'M GOING TO BARF ALL OVER
YOU. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> LET'S GET TO THE NEWS. PRESIDENT TRUMP IS AT IT AGAIN.
>> OH, I CAN'T. >> USING A DEEPLY OFFENSIVE WORD
WHEN DESCRIBING HAITI AND SOME AFRICAN COUNTRY.
>> CAN YOU -- >> JOINING ME, WERE PRINCETON
AND THE CENTER OF AFRICAN-AMERICAN STUDIES.
EDDIE. THIS IS A BLATANT USE OF RACIST
LANGUAGE. WHY DON'T GOP LEADERS CONDEMN
THIS IMMEDIATELY. >> FIRST, BECAUSE, EDDIE YOU
HAVE STUDIED THIS STUFF EXTENSIVELY, I MEAN, CAN YOU
IMAGINE ANY OTHER PRESIDENT MAKING COMMENTS LIKE THIS,
WHAT'S YOUR TAKE? ?
>> I MEAN? I MEAN, THIS IS NOT THE FIRST
TIME THAT HE SAID SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
IS THIS A SURPRISE GIVEN HIS COMMENTS IN THE PAST?
HE'S TALKING ABOUT HAITIANS, HE'S TALKING ABOUT AFRICANS.
AND THE QUESTION IS THIS. WHEN WILL THEY GET TO SPEAK?
WHEN IS IT THEIR TURN? HOW LONG WILL THEY BE SILENCED.
>> I PERSONALLY -- >> GREAT POINTS.
THANK YOU FOR JOINING US. [ LAUGHTER ]
[ APPLAUSE ] >>> WELL, IT HAS BEEN A TOUGH
WEEK FOR THE PRESIDENT WITH THE RELEASE OF THE SENSATIONAL NEW
BOOK, "FIRE AND FURY: INSIDE THE TRUMP WHITEHOUSE."
JOINING US IS THE AUTHOR OF THAT BOOK, MICHAEL WOLFF.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> THANKS FOR HAVING ME.
NOW. >> NOW, MICHAEL, THIS BOOK IS
WILD. >> INSANE.
>> THE CONVERSATIONS ARE SO INTIMATE.
>> IT'S DEPRESSING. IT IS AMAZING WHAT YOU FOUND.
YOU SAY THE PRESIDENT WATCHES TV MOST OF THE DAY, HE EATS
McDONALD'S BECAUSE HE IS AFRAID OF BEING POISONED.
IS THERE ANYTHING THAT YOU DIDN'T INCLUDE?
>> SURE. PROBABLY THE WORST ONE IS THE
BABY RACES. >> WHAT?
>> BEG YOUR PARDON? >> THERE WERE BABY RACES.
TRUMP WOULD ASK TO HAVE TWO BABIES PLACED IN HIS OFFICE,
USUALLY OF DIFFERENT ETHNICITIES.
SOMEONE WHO PUT A BOWL OF GOLD FISH CRACKERS ON THE OTHER SIDE
OF THE ROOM, AND TOUCH WOULD SAY "1,000 BUCKS ON THE BLACK ONE".
>> IS THAT REAL? >> YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> MICHAEL, THERE HAVE BEEN
SEVERAL ERRORS POINTED OUT IN THIS BOOK ALREADY.
DO YOU TAKE RESPONSIBLE FOR THOSE?
>> LOOK, YOU READ IT, RIGHT? >> YEAH, OF COURSE.
>> YEAH. >> YOU LIKED IT?
YOU HAD FUN. YEAH.
>> YEAH, I -- >> WELL, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM.
YOU GOT THE GIST, SO SHUT UP. [ LAUGHTER ]
EVEN THE STUFF'S NOT TRUE, IT'S TRUE.
>> I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT WAS TRUE.
THE WHITE HOUSE IS A CESSPOOL. I CAN'T, AND I CAN'T.
>> YOU KNOW, THIS ONE -- IT HAS BEEN AT AN 11 FOR THE PAST YEAR.
I THINK YOU ARE HANGRY. THIS ONE IS ANGRY.
CALM DOWN. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO FOR
LUNCH? >> I DON'T KNOW.
>> I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. YOU ARE A STEAK FLORENTINE GAL.
>> YEAH? ARE YOU GOING TO FEED ME MY
MEAT? BECAUSE YOUR DIRTY DOG?
>> YOU KNOW I AM. RUFF.
RUFF. [ LAUGHTER ]
MICHAEL, ONE PERSON WHO IS HEAVILY FEATURED IN THIS BOOK IS
STEVE BANNON, WHO WAS JUST LET GO AS HEAD OF BREITBART NEWS.
HERE TO TALK ABOUT IT, STEVE BANNON.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> GOOD MORNING.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> STEVE, STEVE, GOOD LORD.
>> MY GOD SH STEVE, I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU LOOKED LIKE DEATH,
BUT THIS IS DEATH WARM OVER. >> THANK YOU, MIKA.
NICE WORDS. >> YOU GUYS KNOW EACH OTHER,
RIGHT. >> OF COURSE, I GOT HIM FIRED.
>> COME ON. I GOT YOU HIRED.
>> YOU LOVE IT. EVEN THE NEGATIVE STUFF, YOU
LOVE IT. >> DON'T LOVE IT.
DON'T LOVE IT. LOOK, NO ONE GETS THE BANNON
FIRED, NO ONE. >> EXCEPT ME.
I DID. >> I NEVER SAID DON JR. WAS
TREASONOUS. >> YES YOU DID.
>> WELL I CERTAINLY NEVER SAID THAT HE CRACKED LIKE AN EGG ON
TV. >> YEAH, THAT SOUNDS EXACTLY
LIKE YOU. >> OKAY THAT DOES SOUND LIKE ME.
YEAH. ALL RIGHT.
THANK YOU. GOOD REPORTING.
BUT, LOOK, THE CANNON MAGIC IS STILL OUT THERE.
STEVE BANNON, THE BANNON CANNON, MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC.
KING OF KING MAKERS. THE BANNON DYNASTY IS DAWNING.
>> UH-HUH, AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW?
>> I'M WORK OG AN WEB SERIES FOR KRARKEL.
IT'S CALLED PICKUPS AND CARS GETTING COFFEE.
I'M ALSO COMING OUT WITH A NEW LINE OF WRINKLED BARN JACKETS
CALLS FRUMPERS FOR GUYS. SPRINGTIME, SKIN CARE LINE.
BLOCH. >> YOU KNOW WHAT?
COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU ARE DONE. IT'S OVER.
>> STEVE, DO YOU THINK THEY WILL EVER LET YOU BACK INTO POLITICS?
>> YES, AND ON THE CANNON'S MATERIALS, TOO, AS A KING MAKER.
I CONVINCED THIS COUNTRY TO ELECT DONALD.
AND I CAN DO IT AGAIN. ALREADY AUDITIONING CANDIDATES.
GOT SOME PROSPECTS. LOGAN PAUL.
MARTIN SHKRELI. THE SUBWAY GUY, JARED FOGLE.
HE'S BACK. HE'S ELECTABLE.
IT'S TIME FOR AMERICA TO SLIDE DOWN THE BANNON-STER.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ APPLAUSE ]
>> YOU KNOW, STEVE, I HAVE TO ADMIT IT, YOU DID SOMETHING
AMAZING. YOU TOOK THE BIGGEST LONG SHOT
IN HISTORY AND YOU GOT HIM ELECTED PRESIDENT.
AND YOU UNLEASHED THIS MONSTER OF BIBLICAL PROPORTION UPON THE
UNIVERSE. >> MICHAEL WOLFF, THAT'S THE
SWEETEST THING ANYONE EVER SAID TO HE MOO.
THANK YOU. >> I CAN'T.
THE AMERICA WE LOVED IS OVER. AND NO ONE IS COMING TO SAVE US.
AND NO ONE CAN. >> WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S GO
LIVE BY SATELLITE TO A SPECIAL GUEST.
>> I'M HERE! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> OH, MY GOD, IT'S OPRAH. I THOUGHT I SMAULD LAVENDER AND
MONEY. >> YEAH.
OPRAH, ARE YOU RUNNING? >> WELL, I AM A CELEBRITY, SO
I'M QUALIFIED. BUT I'M DIFFERENT FROM DONALD
TRUMP BECAUSE I'M ACTUALLY A BILLIONAIRE.
SO WHO KNOWS? I MEAN, THERE IS ONLY ONE JOB IN
THE WORLD MORE POWERFUL THAN BEING PRESIDENT.
>> OH, REALLY? WHAT'S THAT?
>> BEING OPRAH! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
BYE. >> THANK YOU OPRAH.
THAT WAS DELIGHTFUL. THANKS FOR BEING HERE.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S "SATURDAY NIGHT"!
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Morning Joe Michael Wolff Cold Open - SNL

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